Hey, I am not completely dead. I haven't been blogging for a looong looong time because of my increasing paranoia of exams. Well, it sooo doesn't mean that I've been studying day and night, it just means that I've been refraining (or trying to refrain) from entertainment (of all sorts except daydreaming;) ). Even though my studies haven't been going all that good, I've been exhibiting a calm and cool exterior which "lies through the teeth"(well, just an expression) about my sweaty,clammy,interior where my blood pressure has, am sure, shot up to kingdom came ;).So I am back, to entertainment country... ;)

I saw this movie "It's a Wonderful Afterlife" by Gurinder Chaddha. It was such an awesome stressbuster.... It was funny,witty,corny.....to sum it up, totally worth it (Well, we'd gotten an offer ticket from Uni, so it just cost us a pound ;)). Superb entertainment capsuled in 100 minutes...

I'm just back from a revision lecture, waiting for the next one,which is due at 6:30, whiling away time,not studying like I should be doing and watching Sex and the city (again). I dunno why people didn't like it as much as the series, I absolutely LOVED it...Well, maybe because I had a group like that in school,who knew (and still knows) each other's secrets to the letter and keep them from all prying eyes forever ( my five greatest friends I miss BADLY). And so, here I am, watching it for the 100th time, and thinking about Carrie's fourth book idea for the 100th time... What happens when you have found your love???

Whenever I read a book, or see a movie, the part that troubles me the most is never the turbulent lives of the protagonists...it is always the "happily ever after". It has always been like that, I've always had trouble picturing that part, especially because no one ever went on to explain it. Even when you are a kid, all your bedtime stories end with the prince and the princess (or Mary and the lamb or whoever) living happily ever after. I've always been like, then what..?? What happens after they start their lives...do they fight,have kids, get a divorce????

Weird huh??? LOL

Whenever I'm in a relationship and everything is going all nice and cute and dreamy, and if something so much as start looking SERIOUS, these RED panic alarms go off in my head, making more noise than a fire truck in a traffic jam!!! I'm like "Oh MY God, What if 'this' goes wrong, what if 'that' happens, blah blah blah.... which ultimately results in me trying all I can to get out of it!!! Well, that has happened a couple of times... and I've dated only three guys so far...so..do the math!!!

I used to just classify myself as a committment-phobic and be done with it... But I think what I'm really worried about is that whether I will EVER get that happily-ever-after...whether I'll ever find THE RIGHT GUY...whether I'll EVER be so lucky......... As my friend says, "Honey, for that there needs to be a guy in the first place,and then comes everything else". Now, there IS a guy, my alarm bells are ALREADY ringing (and which I'm ignoring)..... I just want to take things as they come, one day at a time....even I might get LUCKY someday!!!

PS: I'm not looking for a Prince, for then I'll have to kiss a TOAD (or FROG or whatever) and personally, I don't fancy them much,even if they turn into the most delectable creatures ........LOL ;)